after talking to her, i really realise how much it means to me, how much i really miss.
the times we laughed together.
the way i helped u choose the clothes for the game.
can your exams just end quickly and let me get this over and done with? although things may not turn out the way i want, but at least i know, and i will get over it and and, stop wasting my time.
yea i should stop hurting myself and gettting myself into silly trouble.
i ought t say sorry, to myself.
you're one in a million, so am i.
jolenekoh(:
i'm so pissed that i feel like struggling you and scolding *.
damnit.
i'm losing my cool.
maybe i've put too much hopes on you.
maybe i just feel the same way as the other person does, just that i know i have to give you my support and it's not your fault.
maybe i've put you too high in my life.
maybe you're just too much for me to cope.
maybe i'm just too concerned bout you and everything you do affects me.
maybe i should just change,
maybe i should be more understanding,
maybe i should just put others in front of me all the time,
maybe i should just be selfless all my life,
maybe i should just be there always for friends and be alone for myself.
maybe i should just let loose of everything,
maybe i should just stop being paranoid,
maybe i should just stop assuming,
MAYBE I SHOULD JUST STOP EVERYTHING.
stop life.
where are you when i need you the most?
this is getting intolerable.
-------
i realise how much i didn't know myself.
i realise that there's just something that i want badly.
i realise that.. maybe, just maybe.. whatever.
i realise that i'm not as strong as who i think i am.
i realise that, i've been holding it out too long.
the person you see elsewhere but here, is not jolene.
jolenekoh(:
pictures for thought. (click to enlarge)
jolenekoh(:
there're many things in life that i have interest in, passion for.
but most of them requires monetary investments.
and sadly, i do not have this capability at the point in life.
times when i will be jealous of others whose family are well off and able to afford the things that i want badly. and there are also times when i hate those kids who do not cherish and take things, and life, for granted.
and times when i will hate financial issues, cos money is the root of all evil.
so tell me, that i can and i will, earn big bucks in future to eliminate financial issues in my life and my family.
and as of now, in order to achieve that, i have t study, score good results, land myself a great job with a good pay.
with that, tell me, how much does university fees cost? tell me and tell me straight. i'm graduating from poly in another month's time or so. i'm gonna apply for university studies.
BUT WHERE WILL THE MONEY COME FROM?!
jolenekoh(: